Not even a word
by entre-lagrimas-y-suspiros
Summary: [Oneshot]12 years after HBP and one fail love affair later Hermione and Minerva see each other for the first time in years at a Ministry Ball. This is MinervaHermione femmeslash. Please R&R.


_AN: When I first came up with this story I was going for all angst but I love Minerva and Hermione to much to be so mean, also I'm a sucker for a happy ending. As always please review, tell me if you love it, hate it, or anythin in between. _

_Enjoy-Xio_

Not even a word

Minerva smoothed the green dress robes for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. She was incredibly nervous but then again she had good reason for it. As she looked at the names on the table she had been seated at her apprehension only mounted, on the plate next to hers edged in gold was her name, 'Hermione Granger'. Forget nervous she was completely terrified of what the evening might bring. Minerva hadn't been looking forward to the Ministry's '10 Years of Peace' celebratory ball she had known as soon as she opened the invitation that the 20th of July would not be a day she would remember fondly in the years to come. She had known that she would have to come face to face to the one person she had been trying to avoid at all cost for the better part of the last five years. Minerva felt dread cruising through her once more, sweet god had it really been that long since she had last seen Hermione. She tried to recall from the vault of her aging mind the last memory she had of Hermione, for what she wasn't sure because she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that even if a hundred years would have gone by she would still be able to pick Hermione out in a crowd.

Minerva looked around the room. The Ministry had really tried to show off for its guest tonight. The large hall was drowning in candle light from a sinful number of small candles which hovered a few feet above everyone's heads. She could see a couple of very familiar faces scattered about the hall. The table next to hers' had almost the entire Weasley clan, and she suddenly wished she could be seating next to Molly and Arthur. But of course that would be a breach of decorum, she was after all one of the guest of honor and as such she was condemned to a separate table to which the Minister himself would be seated when dinner was served. As she turned back to the main door Minerva sighed loudly and cursed herself for being so damn honest. Cursed herself for not sending a polite decline to the Ministry's invitation claiming to be ill or busy or both. There at the door where the other four people with whom she would have to exchange polite conversation over the next few hours.

Harry Potter looked as handsome as always in his tuxedo and his wife looked beautiful with the glow of pregnancy around her, Harry and Ginny really did make a perfect couple. Next to them also walking arm in arm was Ron Weasley and the woman who was making her more nervous than she had ever been in her entire life. Minerva felt her heart pounding against her chest cavity painfully, Hermione was gorgeous in a deep blue gown, her favorite color and the one that she look best in according to Hermione. The woman could still capture her undivided attention from across the room, Minerva felt her heart constrict again but none the less stood to join the rest of the guest in a round of applause for the heroes of the last war against Voldemort.

If possible their fame had grown in the last ten years making all the Order members into household names, but none had been in the lime light more as the 10th anniversary of Voldemort's demise approached as the golden trio as the reporters loved to call Harry, Ron, and Hermione. In all the storm of stories printed about how they had all met and they things they had done and the battles they had fought, there had been a certain number of stories that alluded to the possible engagement of two of the heroes, Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger. Minerva had hated those stories, hoping against all rational thought that it wasn't true even though she had been well aware of their relationship from its beginning and had known that it would someday end in a wedding and a happily ever after. Everyone got a happy ending except her apparently.

Minerva swallowed and put her best game face on as she saw the Minister walking towards the two couples and escorting them to the table she was already seated at. Ginny Weasley, now Potter, to her left and Hermione Granger to her right with Harry and Ron round off the table. As Ron pulled out Hermione's chair so that she could sit down Hermione looked down at the older woman, Minerva could feel Hermione's eyes burning into the top of her head but refused to look up, it would happen soon enough no need to rush into the hurt. Minerva could feel that Hermione's eyes never looked away as she finally sat, coming to eye level with her and now there was no good excuse to not look at her. Finally she let her blue eyes travel across the small space that separated their chairs up Hermione's neck to her face and finally meeting the dark chocolate brown eyes she had once known so well. She felt something in her come alive once more, she hated to admit it but she had missed Hermione; more than missing though her body, her heart, her soul, seemed to scream their need for the woman that was only a foot away from her and completely out of reach at the same time.

"Good evening Minerva." Minerva leaned in to give her once favorite student, once colleague, and once love a kiss on the cheek. She felt her lips catch on fire as they remember the smooth skin beneath them.

Minerva forced herself to sit back, forced her lips to stop touching what they most desired. "Good evening Hermione it's been a long time."

Hermione gave her a smile, fake Minerva can tell and she can also tell Hermione thinks she is fooling her, that she is well hidden behind that smile. And Minerva knows in that moment that though it has been too many years, too many extremely long days, and too many excruciating lonely nights that she still knows Hermione better than the 28 year old knows herself and much better than Ronald Weasley will ever know her.

"Yes too long." She says before turning to give all of attention to Ronald Weasley. Minerva feels like she has lost everything worth living for as soon as Hermione brown eyes leave her.

Minerva is left to steal glance at Hermione as the four talk easily and as the try, bless them, to include her in their conversation. But Minerva doesn't really care about talking all she can bring herself to care about is that Hermione Granger is once again within sight and she can feast her eyes on her, sedating the hunger that has been building. In five years her hunger has become a monster and all she wants to do is stare outright at the beautiful woman beside her but she knows that now she not free to do so, that now Ronald Weasley has that pleasure. Minerva wishes she could hate him but she can't because she knows there is none at fault for it not working out between Hermione and her, none but life so she decides to hate life instead.

"You must come professor." Minerva is startled out of her thoughts by Harry.

"I'm sorry?"

She sees Ginny smile sadly at her and realizes she has been caught staring at Hermione though as she looks around its seems it was only Ginny that saw her. "Harry was just saying that you should come by the house sometime for one of the Potter-Weasley family gatherings."

"Of course, just let me know when and I'll be there." She says smiling sweetly at her old students and even now when she hasn't seen then in years the closest thing she has to family. Minerva can feel Hermione's eyes on her once more and realizes that Hermione knows she is lying that she has no intention on going anywhere where she might have to see her on another's arm. The conversation continues its course and soon she finds herself alone as they go to say hello to the Weasley clan. Minerva is relief to be away from Hermione it was getting too hard to breath with her that close, with her so real. But her reprieve doesn't last for long and soon she finds herself facing Hermione again this time they are the only one's at the table and suddenly Minerva has the distinct feeling that she might faint.

Hermione stares at her for a long time as if studying her. "How are you Minerva?"

How was she? She felt like she might die from the amount of emotions that the simple question evoked.

"Fine, just fine busy as usual Hogwarts doesn't run itself after all." She babbles and can see Hermione knows it is lie as the words are making their way out of her mouth. But what else can she say, how do you tell someone you haven't seen in five years that the sight of them is enough for you to know that there is no problem terrible enough for you any more if it meant they would come back to you. That all the arguments and the shouting can be worked out, that you can deal with it, that you will find a way to deal with it as long as she tells you she still loves you. That nothing matters as long as she says she loves you just as much as she used to, loves you as much as you love her. She can feel Hermione's eyes on her trying to read her like she used to when words were never necessary for communication though they loved to use them, like when silences weren't awkward but mostly moments in which they were more attune with each other than when they talked.

She curses Ronald Weasley in earnest this time when he excuses himself and asks Hermione to dance. Minerva looks at Hermione as she molds her body to his and they start to sway slowly, and remembers a dance long ago in a dark office with no music which led to their first kiss. Minerva can still feel how Hermione had trembled in her arms then and how she had wrapped her arms tighter around her, as she tights them around herself now for protection. She feels like her world is falling apart once more. This time worst than the day Hermione left because now she had seen with her own eyes that she was no longer hers. Minerva got up making her way through the crow to the door. She couldn't look at her love in another's arms anymore, couldn't stay there as her heart broke into a million pieces.

Hermione turned her face from Ron's shoulder to look at the table only to find it empty, she looked again to make sure. She was about to rest her head on Ron's shoulder once more when she felt the need to look up towards the door, as if her life might depend on it, and she did in time to see Minerva close it. Hermione felt her heart accelerating its tempo, her brain being folded with adrenaline, she had to do something. She leaned towards Ron and whispered, "I'll be right back."

Ron stopped dancing but held on to her wrist, he knew she had been nervous all day and had felt her distant all evening. None would ever say be was perceptive but in that moment he knew that if he let her go, it would be over. "Hermione, please don't."

Hermione looked up at him, Ron had always been a great friend and a good boyfriend, but she knew where she needed to be, where she wanted to be, and it wasn't with him. "I'm sorry." Ron watched her move away from him, disappear into the crowd, and reappear again by the door. He watched her as she left him until the door closed behind her.

Hermione walked quickly down the hall, she knew that Minerva was going home back to Hogwarts maybe she could catch up to her but if not she would follow her all the way to the ancient castle. Hermione reached the main door in time to see Minerva as she dissaparated, Hermione walked onto the drive and did the same.

When she apparated outside of Hogwarts gates, she could she Minerva walking up towards the castle, as Hermione followed Minerva she indulged in a small smile she had almost forgotten how fast the woman walked. Hermione followed her all the way to the main entrance and was about to call out when the she saw the door close, she sighed. Hermione knew the castle should recognize her but wasn't sure. She might have come for nothing if the door didn't open for her. She pushed lightly on it and felt relief wash over her as the castle remembered her and opened itself up for her. Hermione walked inside looking around but there was no trace of Minerva, it didn't matter she knew the way.

When she reached the Headmistress gargoyle she realized she had no idea what the password was. Hermione fidget a little deciding what to do then whispered 'dark chocolate' and watch with a satisfied, yet very surprised, smile as the stairs appeared. At the top Hermione reached for the handle of the main office and found the office dark and empty, she walked to the small circular stairs and made her way up to Minerva's private rooms.

Minerva startled as she heard her door opening, and then nearly had a heart attack as she recognized the woman before her. "Hermione what are..?"

But she didn't get to finish the sentence as Hermione walked right up to her then pulled Minerva into her body before slamming her lips against the older woman's. When Hermione pulled back Minerva tried her voice once again. "Hermione?"

"I love you." Minerva closed her eyes savoring those words, that moment for a minute.

"What about Mister Weasley?"

"I can't begin anything Minerva, because this isn't over yet."

"Will it ever be over?" Minerva asked afraid of the answer.

"I sure as hell hope not." Minerva smiled and then felt Hermione's lips against her own once more this time gentle, moving with familiarity, knowing when to seeking and when to give pleasure.

"I hope not, too. I love you." Minerva was about to move in for another kiss when Hermione spoke.

"Dark chocolate, you haven't changed the password?"

"I still see your eyes in my dreams. And it's still the one thing I can remember when I am so tired I can't remember my own name." Hermione shook her head then pulled Minerva in for another kiss. It had never been over between them, it would never be over. They would also recognize each other's souls, each other's hearts even through the arguments and the shouting, even through the distance, the passing years, and the heartache. No word could ever capture the intensity of their love. No word not even a hurtful one would ever destroy it.


End file.
